Thursday, June 30, 2011

Comments, Statements and other such Nonsense

OK, so, I know I have 7 kids. I know this seems like a lot to most people. And on more than a few occasions like, say, grocery shopping, shoe or clothes shopping, going out to eat, buying a car or even a house, or even visiting family and friends, I tend to agree. But, most of the time, this is just my life. We have 7 kids and that is that. I mean, I know that it takes a special sort of person to have 7 really want and have always kinda wanted to have 6+ kids and of course you know that when I say "special" I mean, well, crazy, insane, demented, and a few other choice words I've heard people say about me. ;) I also do realize that this is more than the average household has. It is a bit hectic and crazy, true. If you are the type of person who likes order in the house, peace and quiet, lots of "me" time, then, yes, maybe having 7 little ones running around destroying things is not quite on your agenda. Me? I've come to enjoy the spontaneity of my days, the struggle to find time for certain things or for each child; the kids have taught me how to let things go and enjoy the moment; I literally expect the unexpected and seem to thrive on the chaos and disorder of our day to day living. After all, things always end up working out in the end, right? Well, maybe not as planned or how we wanted it to work out, but work out it does.

So, when we all go out together...we get looks, stares, statements, comments, questions and yes, even gasps. You'd think that by now I'd just simply pay no attention to all that kinda stuff I get while out with all know, it really does come with the territory. And, honestly, most of the time I do. I mean, I try to be polite when people stop and stare or ask questions, but really....some are just too plain memorable to forget and some, well, some I am just, quite frankly, sick of (as are the kids!)! :) So, the other day, when we went on our usual outings, I got to hear all those statements all over again. It's been a while....I guess I was a bit overdue, huh?

Here are some examples for you to enjoy:
-Are they all yours? (nope...I just go out and find 7 kids to take with me for the fun of it)
-You've got your hands full! (with what, exactly?)
-Boy, you're busy. (and you're not?)
-All from the same daddy? (yes, sadly folks, people ask me this in front of the kids!) (hmmm, I guess that question stems from the fact that they all look nothing alike!)
-They all came out of your body? (love that one)....(no, actually, didn't you see?...they're givin' 'em away free on aisle 5, go pick up a few for yourself)
-I don't know how you do it? (well, neither do I!)
-Wow, that's impressive. (gee, thank you....I take that one as a compliment!)
-Look Mommy, they have 7 kids in their family. (jealous....are you?)
-Don't you know what causes that? (um, apparently so)
-Boy, your husband much be rich? (hmmm....OK, if we're married, does that mean I'm rich too?) front of the kids....
-And on the other end of the spectrum: Are you on welfare? (why do you ask?)
-What do you do with all those kids? (wasn't really sure how to answer that one?)
-Wow, I can't even go to the store/restaurant/doctor office, etc with my 2 and you're here with 7? (well, not sure what that says about you or your kids?!? YIKES!)
-Better you than me. (I agree with that one!)
-"one, two, three, four, five, six, seven!" Wow, seven kids?? (great, so you can count, I see?)
-and my all time favorite from some radical, saving the world from overpopulation person: they are using up all of our natural resources, etc (really? 7 kids are using it ALL up?) and when I responded to her, she came up with: well, you might do your part, but in the end, they still have to breathe the air. (Yes, people, my kids do breathe air....oh my.....the world is coming to an end!! HELP!!!)

I could probably go on, but these are the ones that we hear the most often and that I have to chuckle about every once in a great while.  But, considering there are many more families out there with many more kids than us, my/our few incidents probably don't compare to those families in any way, shape, or form. It just makes for a good laugh or 2....or 7! ;)

T-Shirts, Bumper Stickers and Magnets!

Here are some slogans, sayings and other such nonsense you just might come across on me, my car, or in my house:

"I survived my weekend!" 1 baseball practice, 1 softball game, 1 umpire job, 1 t-ball game with 2 kids, 2 advanced softball games (double header), 2 baseball games (another double header), 2 injuries, and 1 sleepover.
{Not that amazing? Lemme just add that Hubby was out of town with Claudia for her softball tournament (2nd place) !}

"Nothin' says lovin' like filling up your 12 passenger van for $112.00 and driving off with a big ol' smile on your face."

"'Super Mom' doesn't live here anymore" (not that she ever did...)

"7 kids, 15+ years of diapers, and approximately 35,000 diaper changes".

"Got Kids?"

"Yes, they're all mine and yes, we know what causes that, thank you very much!"

"Mom's Taxi? Puhleeze...that's for amateurs. Try 'Mom's Shuttle Service' 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year." For all those pick me up in the middle of the night sleepover fiascoes, trips to outings and events, late night party pick ups, out of town tournaments, or the my friend needs a ride, I forgot my lunch, cleats, etc, etc, etc,--can you bring them to me please, among many other services.

"Diorama-mama" (enough said)

"Got Mess?"

"Pork Chop: noun, used to describe (lovingly of course) my 19 month old daughter as I try (and I do mean try) to stuff her into size 24 month clothes."

"Meet me at the Pediatrician's Office"

Oh, I could probably go famous Scarlett O'Hara fashion: I don't want to think about that right now....I'll think about it tomorrow. After all tomorrow is another day. Hey, sometimes a mom's gotta do what a mom's gotta do.
Nothing's ever easy.....whatever we do seems to take longer, be more difficult, or something than we originally planned.
And, I could definitely take the "Got Milk" slogan to a whole 'nother level! Got Laundry? Got Sports? Got Big? list would never end.....

Guess I'll go make some T-shirts now.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Mission: Impossible

"Good morning Mrs. Mom of Seven.
Your mission Mama 7, should you decide to accept it, is to cook, clean, do laundry, pay bills, balance the checkbook, make phone calls, plan events, calendar such events and others given to you, attend, or at least get child/ren to, event, clean, cook again, do more laundry, organize, menu plan, budget funds, play with children, read books to children, pick up after children, bathe children, get them to sleep--in their own bed, nurse babies, feed children, discipline children, help with homework, dole out chores, do more laundry, drive children all over town (sometimes even out of town AND out of state) for sports, events, sleepovers, play dates (which sometimes you have to plan for them), possibly picking up more children (that do NOT belong to you) to get to said location, host sleepovers, play dates and study groups, take care of sick children, take them to doctor, dentist and orthodontist appointments (occasionally, even the ER!) without over booking or double booking any events or appointments (please remember that you can NOT be at more than one location at a time), send out school notes, bring birthday items to school and plan their parties (which will involve more cooking, cleaning, organizing and planning), find some time to spend time with each child, husband and "me time" and of course, do more laundry....and any other things that just might come up with children, husband or yes, even yourself. Be prepared. This mission, is day in, day out, every day, 7 days of the week, 365 days a year. Please do it with a smile on your face and enjoy yourself whilst working your mission.
As always, should you or any of your I.M. Force be caught or killed, the Secretary will disavow any knowledge of your actions. This tape will self-destruct in five seconds.
Good luck, Diana."

Do you remember that show? It was a show in the late 60's to the early 70's. My brother and I used to watch it religiously. It was of course in syndication, but we didn't care if we saw repeats. It was a fantastic show and later it came back again in the 80's sometime, but with little success. I'm sure I'm telling my age with that one, but if you don't know or remember the show, here you go:

Later, in the 90's to the 2000's, because it was such a great show, a few movies were made with Tom Cruise as the lead. Now, I know you know at least some of these.

Well.....that is the story of my life. Yes, indeed. I am not too proud to admit it, but if I were to summarize my life, my day to day activities and responsibilities, in 2 words, just take a guess at what they would be! You got it!! Mission: Impossible!

That is what I feel like. Now, with each additional child, it always takes me a bit longer to adjust to a new and different schedule and routine. But, now, as the kids get older, this is becoming much more challenging. I am no longer in control of their schedules and activities as much. Now, they have school responsibilities, they have sports, they have friends, and one even has a job. I feel like I am constantly treading water, running around like a chicken with it's head cut off (I hate that saying, but I truly feel like I can relate these days!), scatter-brained with a bi-polar sort of disorder with racing thoughts, ideas and plans--always something to do. Some days I find the time to make a list, but I NEVER, ever get to it all. Sometimes, I make the list, only to leave it behind as I scramble out the door to goodness only knows how many errands, events and things to do. And guess what happens then? I inevitably forget matter how minute. These days, I feel my age. I really do. Not so much during the day, but at bedtime...I'd rather the kids read me a story to go to sleep to. Quite frankly about half the kids probably go to sleep after me! And the mornings? Forget about it. I can hit the snooze button for hours given half the chance.

But--somehow, I manage. Yeah, sure, mostly I throw things up in the air and try to catch the important stuff as it comes back down. Sometimes I drop a few too many, but hey, I do my best. Some things, you just have to learn to let go. I also realize that pretty soon, it will be summer time. The light at the end of the tunnel. And...I do know that next year, as sad as it will make me, Andrew will be in school as well, leaving me at home all alone with a young toddler. All day long. You hear that? Only one child at home, all school year long. I'm not so sure I'll know what to do with myself. Truly! As it has been 13 years since I've only had one at home with me for that long of a time frame during the day. YIKES.

For now though....I'm enjoying my mission. I rarely choose not to accept it, though there are days I wished I had! And once I admitted that the mission really is impossible, it makes it that much more easier to accept it. So, I better get going, as my mission for the past week has been to fold and put away laundry. 14 loads folded (AND put away!!) so far in one week--we've even started to wash clothes again....we've done about 6 loads over the weekend.....and 2 of them have been put away already. Exciting, right? It's the little things.....

There are days.....

...that I have no choice but to don my black and white striped shirt and whistle.
...that I have to count my kids out loud in public.
...that I run out of food even after I doubled the recipe.
...that I need 2 grocery carts.
...that my hair stands on edge.
...that I pull my hair out.
...that I'm frazzled, dazzled and razzled!
...that I wonder where the money really went?
...that I can't squeeze another appointment, event or activity on that particular day on the calendar.
...that I spend hours (yes, literally hours!) filling out paperwork (usually school, medical or sports related) for the kids.
...that the word "cleaning" takes on a whole new meaning.
...that I do 6 loads of laundry without even making a dent in the laundry pile.
...that I drive 4 or 5 kids all over town to friend's houses.
...that I drive all over town for 5 kids sporting adventures/extracurricular activities.
...that I have doubled the amount of kids in my house for everyone's sleepovers.
...that I have more than doubled the amount of kids in my house for a birthday party.
...that I cannot help my kids with their homework, because well, they have surpassed me in school and I have a master's degree!!! and graduated Suma Cum Laude...
...that I scarcely make it to the bed before passing out from exhaustion.
...that I just sit, watch and listen.
...that I marvel in their growth, abilities, and maturation.
...but mostly....there are days that my cup runneth over

Things that make you go hmmm.....

No, this isn't quite like the old Arsenio Hall show...these are things that I never thought I'd say, that is, until I became a mother. Where the word normal takes on a whole new meaning and strange statements no longer really make me go hmmm:

Don't sit on your brother's face!!

You can't throw him on the couch like that.

Get off of your brother.

Please! Pick up the living room, now!

Someone's head is still on the floor.

If you throw that car, it will go straight into the trash.

Someone's nail is in my sink, come and get it! (ok--I'll explain this one! a fake nail that someone received as a gift, somehow got loose and kept ending up in my bathroom sink)

Bob the builder is still on the steps, why?

If I've said it once today, I've said it a million times....take the light saber out of the baby's face.

Stop pointing the gun at his/her face!

Don't shoot your brother/sister.

An airplane cut my foot. Really bad.

Oh, if there was a fly on the wall....I'd certainly have some explaining to do

A little intro:

I love to read blogs. I have a personal family blog that I've been writing on for over 3 years now. Time flies, doesn't it? But, now I'm ready to get on to bigger and better things and so here I am. I am a wife to one and mom to seven. 4 boys and 3 girls. We are a busy bunch, you'll often find us out and about on the softball, baseball or soccer fields. Or on the volleyball court....or at gymnastics....well you get the drift! Our kids range in age from 15 to 18 months. Yes, we get all the looks, comments, and what nots that you're probably thinking about right now! But, we love it!! So come follow me on this journey. Oh and leave me a comment or 2, please!
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